Marital Life
Matrimony relates to marriage.i.e.marriage between a man and woman or between a boy and a girl. In this contemporary world, marriage has been legalized among lesbians and homosexuals.Therefore, we mean here, the marriage between a man and woman or between a boy and a girl which the society in large accepts.
Marriage is indispensable to every Human being
Marriage is indispensable for every human being. The elders in the family betroth the marriage. Marriage makes a man complete in all respects.i.e.He becomes a full man. On getting married, he starts a separate family life with additional responsibilities. He gets recognition in the society. He gives birth to children, takes care of the wife conducts him in a respectable way and respects the sentiments of society and elders.
Marriage is a Union of Two Souls
The Indian culture depicted one wife for one man and vice-versa.The Vedic Hindu astrology considers marriage as a "Union of two Souls" living for each other. The Hindu ideology regards marriage as a plant, which needs watering, protection, utmost care and preservation for one thousand years.
The life of an Individual
The life of an Individual in Aryan Society was well organized.An ideal life extended to 100 years and was divided into four phases or ashramas.
- The Brahmacharyashram is the period of student life.A boy left home at the age of seven and stayed with his Guru.Here,he imbibed knowledge and discipline and studied religious literature till he was 25.
- The second stage extended from 25 to 50 years of age and was called Grihasthashram.During this period,he married,maintained a family,educated his children and followed his vocation.
- At the age of 50,he retired to the forest,leaving his household in charge of his eldest son.In the forest,he lived with the sages and devoted himself to contemplation.This stage is called Vanaprasthashram.
- After 75,he became a sanyasi,spreading the message of truth and of religion and giving advice to those who sought it.This stage was known as Sanyasashram.
Below is the news report by "Daily Thanthi"Tamil daily dated 14-04-2009
Heart-Rending Incident in Madras!. Child killed by poisoning:Father attempt to suicide!
Leaves a painful letter stating thathe goes to the place where his wife has gone.
One Maria Francis,aged 30,an Engineering graduate,was living with his wife santha,aged 26,in Egmore,Madras.They had a son aged 6 years and studying in Std.1.Few months back,Santha died of cancer.Unable to bear the loss and out of more affection on her,he decided to commit suicide and killed his son .He committed suicide but was on the verge of death.He has left one letter to the police and one to his father stating that he could not bear the loss of his wife,he loved his wife so much and therefore,he wanted to go to the place where his wife has gone.
Significance of Suitable wife/husband in life
We notice that the human beings are unable to compromise in the choice of their spouse (girls of their choice or boys of their choice). This leads to suicides, suicide attempts, deserted life or bachelor life, which has its own other consequences in the family. A man has wealth. Health and all comforts in life but if the wife was not agreeable to him or the husband was not agreeable to her, his/her entire life goes waste or tasteless. When he or she has no satisfied married life, he/she just lives for others. On the other hand, a man has no wealth and health and other comforts but was blessed with a suitable wife, she enlivens him. Therefore, availing a suitable wife or husband or being blessed with a suitable wife/husband assumes significance in life. In most cases, marriage appears to be determined in advance or is controlled by the events connected to previous births. Called 'Destiny'.
Criteria for Matrimonial Compatibility
The Hindu Astrology evolved rules and regulations for Matrimonial Compatibility. The marital life was harmonious and happy so long as the criteria adopted by the ancient Hindu Astrology were sincerely followed.
The Hindu Astrology prescribes 10 kinds of matrimonial compatibilities namely (1) Rajju (Mangalya)(Strength and duration of Married life)(2)Yoni (Sexual type) (3)Ganam (Species) (4) Dinam (Nakshatra or Birth Star)(Health and Longevity) (5) "Sthiri Theergam" ( Blissful wife)(6) Maahendram (wealth and Virtues)(7) Raashi (constellation)(Power of Attraction) (8) Rulers of the two Rashis (Constellations)(Physical disposition)(9) Vasya (Affinity and Amenability)10.Vedai(Friction)
There are certain other significant and important compatibilities quite relevant to the contemporary world. They are (1) Pulse (Naadi)(2) Blemish of Mars (Kuja Dosha) (3) Identity of minds (Ascendant or Lagna) (4) Rulership Period of the Planets (Dasha)(5) Issue(Putra Bagya) (6)Tree Sastra (7)Birds Sastra (8)Blemish on Spouse (Kalathira Dosha)(9) The serpent of time (Kala Sarpa Yoga) (10) Malefic Effects (Bhava) of Planets : The characteristic features of the couple are very important to lead the marital life happily. Vital factors such as flexibility, stubbornness, tolerance, explosive in nature, short-temperament , matured temperament, extent of loyalty and reliability towards the spouse, mutual attachment in the ups and downs in the course of marital life, need special attention while making comparison of horoscopes for matrimonial purpose.
Exception to the Rules
- When the parents and relatives of the family belonging to the boy and the girl betroth the marriage at childhood itself, then there is no necessity to go for the rules and regulations put forward in the natal astrology.
- When the marriage is betrothed in deference to the wishes of a Ishta Devata (Favorite Goddesses),the rules for comparisons of Horoscope for matrimonial Compatibility is not necessary.
- When the boy and the girl live as a husband and wife before marriage, then Rules for comparisons of Horoscope for matrimonial Compatibility need not come into the picture at all.
- When the girl becomes pregnant before marriage, then Rules of matrimonial Compatibility should not come in the way.
- When a marriage is betrothed to fulfill the desires of forefathers or ancestors at the dying bed, Rules for comparisons of Horoscope for matrimonial Compatibility may be ignored.
- When a marriage is performed suddenly and unexpectedly due to the non-availability of the already betrothed boy or girl, Rules for comparisons of Horoscope for matrimonial Compatibility are ignored.
- When a boy or a girl elopes, Rules for comparisons of Horoscope for matrimonial Compatibility could not be followed.
Culture undergoing a vast change
Shashi Tharoor marries Sunanda Pushkar
The former Union Minister, Shashi Tharoor,(54years) and Sunanda Pushkar(48years)during their wedding ceremony at Elavanchery near Palakkad on Sunday.the 22nd August,2010. This is the third marriage for both Mr. Tharoor and Ms. Pushkar. The marriage was also attended by Siva, Ms. Pushkar's son from her earlier marriage, and Mr. Tharoor's sons from his first marriage, Ishaan and Kanishk.
Below is the news report by "Daily Thanthi"Tamil daily dated 17-10-2007
Austria girl marries Tamil Saint!Changes her dress code!
In ancient days, marriages took place among relatives and among known people and neighbours. This culture is undergoing a vast change thanks to the advancement of science and technology, education, infrastructure, sound financial position, invasion of foreign culture and social status. Today, the social awareness has emboldened the youngsters to marry anyone of their choice irrespective of the caste, creed, religion and community. Their choice is dominated by the lust in the physical appearances and at times, the sophisticated culture and rich family status and sound financial status. The flaw in their choice lies not in the parent's upbringing but in the teen age. The age between 16 years and 21 years is vulnerable to sexual habits for both genders. They are unaware of consequences of their actions owing to the immature temperament. We see many young men and women who have self-determined the choice of their spouse and married under the pretext of love, ignoring the wishes of their parents are repenting now and lead a tearful life covertly. Such couple face lot of inconveniences in the society and they have lost the affection and love of their near and dear ones. Therefore, in order to ensure the smooth moving of the teen ages, the natal horoscope needs to be studied, analyzed and assessed and proper remedies be undertaken as prescribed by the Vedic Astrology.
The olden culture has now changed to a vast extent. Today, in this world of refined culture, the girls have an upper hand and a higher say due to their exposure to the world events and activities and due to the individual earnings, higher education and their self-determination to lead an independent life on their own. The Matrimonial matchmaking compatibility evolved by the Vedic Astrology is disregarded and ignored in Toto and marriages are being made in street corners.
Sexual compatibility holds the couple together
It is a common feature to see married couples in family courts vying each other for divorce. There is a large-scale increase in adulteries, illicit sexual connections, bigamy, elopement, etc. Marital miseries such as death of spouse, deserted life, unsatisfied married life, impotency, etc are ill fated. Careful analyses of all such people's natal horoscope disclose the non-existence of vital compatibilities which are a must for a happy married life. The prime compatibility of 'sexual type' was not available among them. In spite of several ups and downs in married life, it is the sexual compatibility, which holds the couple together for good.
Below is the news report by "Daily Thanthi"Tamil daily dated 1-06-2007
Daughter-in-law kills Mother-in-law! Says,Mother-in-law separated her husband for about
6 months unabling to have sexual intercourse!
A handsome boy marrying an ugly or not so beautiful girl and a beautiful boy marrying an ugly or not so handsome boy is a common feature. Many couple do not possess compatibility in body fitness, colour, height, etc. Yet, the couple happily lives together. The age difference between the couple is also extremely more and in many cases, the girl is aged more than the boy. Yet, the couple happily lives together. It is a common sight that the husband and wife always fight or quarrel with each other daily even in a awesome manner but continue living together leading a happy life This is attributed to the enjoyment attained in the sexual intercourse. Therefore sexual compatibility is the most important factor in marriage.
Below is the news report by "Daily Thanthi"Tamil daily dated 22-07-2009 Page-8
Grand daughter(23) who married Gradather (80) died!
Koneri,aged 80 years in a village in Trichy district,Tamil Nadu,married his grand daughter Mariayee,aged now 23 years ,some 7 years before as a second wife.This couple has one son and two daughters.Marayee died while she underwent family planning operation.
A survey conducted on married women by a magazine run exclusively for women, revealed that only 18% of the married women enjoyed happiness in sexual intercourse with their husbands. Though all of them gave birth to children, they did not avail any type of sexual happiness. They had been only children making machines. Women hailing from respectable family, respecting family sentiments, obedient to divine powers, loyal to husbands, obeying the laws of society, etc.undergo unhappiness in sexual life patiently. This commendable trait of women is traced to previous births or destiny. This could have been avoided, if the matrimonial compatibility prescribed by the Vedic astrology is sincerely adhered to, especially by giving importance to sexual habits or sexual
How to measure Sexual Compatibility
Sexual Compatibility is arrived at by comparing the sexual habits of creatures Each Nakshatra(birth star) is codified with the sexual organs of a creature The Sexual organs of a similar type derive more satisfaction. The sexual organ of a dissimilar type and naturally inimical to each other do not derive any satisfaction at all. Therefore, the sexual compatibility is available if the Nakshatra (birth star) combinations are not radically dissimilar and if they are not naturally inimical to each other.
For example,Ashwini indicates Male Horse and Shatabisha indicates female Horse. If the couple possesses Ashwini and Shatabisha ,their sexual satisfaction is 100%. This is the best match-making proposal, subject to certain other important factors. If either one of the couple possesses Ashwini or Shatabisha and the possessing either Hastha or Swathi which represents buffalo, then the compatibility is 0%.Both are radically dissimilar and which are naturally inimical to each otherThere is no compatibility at all.The idea lying behind is that the sexual habit of Horse is fast and at high speed whereas that of the buffalo is slow and belated.Therefore,both cannot sexually satisfy each other.If such a combination existed between a couple, their life becomes miserable. It leads to illicit connections ,bigamy, deserted life, divorce ,elopement on both sides. Ashwini and Shatabisha may combine with other Nakshatras except with those of Hastha and swathi which will yield good sexual satisfaction. Like this, each Nakshatra has to be combined with the other Nakshatra possessing similar or similar type of sexual organ except with the nakshatra that is inimical and radically dissimilar..
Nakshatra (birth star) combinatinations which are codified as radically dissimilar and which are naturally inimical to each other do not yield sexual compatibility at all and they ought to be declined for marriage.
| Birth stars | Birth stars | |
|---|---|---|
| Ashwini-Shatabisha(Horse) | Enemy/Opponent to | Swati-Hastha(Buffalo) |
| Barani-Revathi(Elephant) | Enemy/Opponent to | PurvaBhadrapada-Dhanishta(Lion) |
| Pushya-Kritika (Sheep) | Enemy/Opponent to | Purva Ashadha-Shravana(Monkey) |
| Rohini-Mrigashirsha(Serpent) | Enemy/Opponent to | Uttara Ashada(Mongoose) |
| Ashlesha-Punarvasu(Cat) | Enemy/Opponent to | Magam-Purva Phalguni(Rat) |
| Magam-Purva Phalguni(Rat) | Enemy/Opponent to | Ashlesha-Punarvasu(Cat) |
| Uttara Phalguni-Uttara Bhadrapada (Cow) | Enemy/Opponent to | Vishaka-Chitra(Tiger) |
| Swati-Hastha(Buffalo) | Enemy/Opponent to | Ashwini-Shatabisha(Horse) |
| Vishaka-Chitra(Tiger) | Enemy/Opponent to | Uttara Phalguni-Uttara Bhadrapada(Cow) |
| Jyeshta-Anuradha(Deer) | Enemy/Opponent to | Mula-Ardra(Dog) |
| Mula-Ardra(Dog) | Enemy/Opponent to | Jyeshta-Anuradha(Deer) |
| PurvaBhadrapada-Dhanishta (Lion) | Enemy/Opponent to | Barani-Revathi(Elephant) |
| Purva Ashadha-Shravana (Monkey) | Enemy/Opponent to | Pushya-Kritika(Sheep) |
| Uttara Ashada(Mongoose) | Enemy/Opponent to | Rohini-Mrigashirsha(Serpent) |
Perfect Match
| Male | Female | |
|---|---|---|
| Ashwini | Shatabisha | Horse |
| Barani | Revathi | Elephant |
| Pushya | Kritika | Sheep |
| Rohini | Mrigashirsha | Serpent |
| Ashlesha | Punarvasu | Cat |
| Magam | Purva Phalguni | Rat |
| Uttara Phalguni | Uttara Bhadrapada | Cow |
| Swati | Hastha | Buffalo |
| Vishaka | Chitra | Tiger |
| Jyeshta | Anuradha | Deer |
| Mula | Ardra | Dog |
| PurvaBhadrapada | Dhanishta | Lion |
| Purva Ashadha | Shravana | Monkey |
| Uttara Ashada | Mongoose | |
Below is the news report by "Daily Thanthi"Tamil daily dated 11-10-2007
Adultery with son-in-law! Mother kills daughter!!
Below is the news report by "Daily Thanthi"Tamil daily dated 24-07-2009
Adultery with Friend!
Husband sacrifices wife and three children to Paramour!!
Karthik(32) and his wife Parvathipriya(27)lived in a village in Erode district. They had two daughters.Karthik's friend Manivasagam(32)used to visit karthik's house often.Manivasagam and Karthik's wife developed illegal connection. Karthik preferred a complaint with the Police.Karthik's wife categorically stated that she wants to live with Manivasagam. Left with no other go,Karthik agreed and sent his wife and children to live with Manivasagam.
Caution about Tailor-made Horoscopes to suit a particular horoscope suppressing the deadly doshas
Today in the world of modern culture, the society has regulated the conduct of marriages between man and woman in deference to their religion and community. Thanks to advancement in Information Technology and media, every matrimonial related news swiftly reach the nook and corner of the bottom people and the girls and boys are able to have wide choices in selecting their spouses. In many cases, the horoscopes are found tailor-made to suit a particular horoscope suppressing the deadly doshas such as KuJa Dosha and Kalathira Dosha.Added to this, girls are equally well educated and earn a better living thus enabling and emboldening them to claim equal status ,rights, etc. from their spouse. The condition of the husband and wife seems to be very pathetic and deplorable. This tendency has landed many couple in family courts for obtaining divorce. The break-down of marriages, adulteries, bigamy. elopement, deserted life are all attributed to ill-fate and in order to prevent all these sorrow and pathetic married life, the Hindu Astrology carries matrimonial guidance.
Cougar relationship: When a man loves an older woman
Somebody has very rightly said love knows no age. At a time when the dynamics of marriage are changing rapidly and youngsters are experimenting with their lives, "cougar" relationship is a new phrase catching up among them.
The term cougar refers to a relationship where a woman is romantically involved with a much younger man and it was the theme of the 2009 superhit film "Wake Up Sid". Audiences loved watching Ranbir Kapoor falling in love with the older Konkona Sen Sharma and even thronged the theatres for it.
"This trend is not so uncommon in India. It has been around for some time now. And, yes, Indian sensibilities are not in conflict with such relationships," psychiatrist Sanjay Chugh told IANS.
"The phenomenon, whether people like it or not, is increasingly coming out in the open. In the past too, such relationships existed but were not talked about too much," he added.
Way back in 1967, Hollywood came out with its well-known classic "The Graduate", where Anne Bancroft, an older woman, seduces a much younger man, played by Dustin Hoffman.And such experiments were not restricted to the celluloid.
Quite a few Hollywood celebrities have had successful "cougar" marriages and the recent example is Demi Moore who has enjoyed marital bliss with 15-year younger actor Ashton Kutcher.
Other such couples are Susan Sarandon and Tim Robbins (12-year age gap), Mariah Carey and Nick Cannon (10-year age gap).
Even pop diva Madonna, known for her experimental looks, tried it when she tied the knot with 10-year younger Guy Ritchie. But they separated two years ago.
In India, the most publicised cougar couple was Saif Ali Khan who married Amrita Singh way back in 1991. She was 12 years older to him. Their marriage had raised a lot of eyebrows, with people questioning the compatibility and the big age-gap, but it lasted a good 12 years. In 2004 they got divorced.
Samir Parikh, a consultant psychiatrist at Max Healthcare, says anything unusual is bound to get attention.
"Anything which is slightly different raises eyebrows for a while. This happens more so with celebrities because they are so much in the public glare and the reactions are all the more manifest," Parikh told IANS.
Even master blaster Sachin Tendulkar's wife Anjali Tendulkar is five years older to him whereas Bollywood actress Manisha Koirala has married seven years younger Samrat Dahal and choreographer-turned-director Farah Khan exchanged vows with eight-year younger Shirish Kunder.
According to Chugh, if one looks at the Indian value system closely, it emphasises on making a relationship work and not so much on the peripherals.
The age difference of a year or two doesn't even qualify for the term "cougar", and there are many examples of such couples in the Hindi film industry - Bollywood actors like Aishwarya Rai and Shilpa Shetty have respectively married Abhishek Bachchan and Raj Kundra who are two years younger to them. Even legendary actress Nargis was a year older to her actor husband Sunil Dutt.
Sometimes such marriages are seen by society as an attempt by a woman to have some fun in her life or by someone who wants to tame her partner and can do so by marrying a younger man.
This psyche was beautifully portrayed by director Ajay Sinha in the popular television serial "Astitva - Ek Prem Kahani", about a young photographer marrying a doctor who's 10 years older to him.
Chugh said: "Just as a woman would look for a father figure or fulfil her needs for protection in an older man, a man would look for a mother figure or fulfil his needs for tender care and love in an older woman."
Moreover, a drastic shift in the financial status has made today's women independent and they enjoy the power to pick and choose their partners without worrying about age, money and caste.
"Women today, just like the men, are experimenting and are also sure enough of themselves to take such chances. In this whole discussion, we must not make it a feminist thing as it is as much a woman's choice as a man's. The younger man is also, at the same time, taking the decision to marry an older woman," said Chugh.
Source: Shilpa Raina/IANS
Image credits: AP; Reuters; Varinder Chawla, India Syndicate
Bollywood actress Ms.Manisha Koirala,aged 41 years, tied the knot with Shri beau Samrat Dahal,aged 34 years, in a traditional ceremony in Kathmandu,Nepal 18-06-2010,Friday.(courtesy:The Daily Thanthi dated 19-06-2010 in Page-9)
To know matrimonial Compatibility